I’ve tried to write a birthday or a Turning Forty post for a few weeks and somehow haven’t been able to muster up either.
This current version of Word that I’m typing in coupled with dip polish is not helping my game here either, but I’m going to persevere… for my fans, of course. (LOL.)
If I’d known what 2018 would bring, I honestly would have run into this new year wearing track shorts, knee socks and the prettiest shoes imaginable. I truly thought that 2018 would be a quiet year, hopefully full of healing with a splash of joy. By mid-year, I discovered that this year brought joy in the form of Niagara Falls because it kept gushing and I needed floaties!
In March, the Lord began to heal some deeply broken places. I had to be brave (which is not my middle name, EVER) and push past levels of fear and discomfort.
In June, I had a moment with the Holy Spirit that was so deep and so soul-wrecking-ly beautiful that I got a tattoo to commemorate it.
The last six months of this year are so full of moments of grace and humility, of joy and hope, of fruition and promise, that I am still struggling with how to articulate it.
To cap it all off, I wound up having the most spectacular birthday and weekend with friends.
There is a song by The Belonging Company that sums up my 2018 –
Beautiful Story
Chorus: You write a beautiful story, you write a beautiful story, from glory to glory I believe. You write a beautiful story, you write a beautiful story, beginning to ending and in between.
Bridge: All the while you keep saying, trust that I am orchestrating, everything for good. All the while you keep saying, trust that I am custom making everything for good. You work all things together for good, all things together for good, all things together for good, like You said You would.
That’s the fun part about the Lord: He writes the story. I think we get lost in the noise that says to write our own narrative – to write our own story. Instead, trusting Him means that He orchestrates our story, and it is a best seller instead of personal diary on a shelf.
This year, The Lord has written my story. He is not finished yet and in true divine fashion, I keep trying to offer notes and suggestion and learn that I never know where this story is going but because He is faithful, this story is working for His glory and for my good. My story is beautiful.
That also prompts my word for 2019 – which is surrender. I have to surrender everything back to him. My heart, my time, my love, my energy, my joy, my heartache, my life.
It’s all His.